three life changing words

Lately I’ve been thinking about my “shitty roommate”.  This is my personal inner voice—she makes me doubt myself all the time.  She puts those snarky thoughts in my head that I’m “not good enough”, “not reaching my potential” or “if only you were more like…”.

Shame is the inner language of self-attack and self-blame AND shame is my shitty roommate’s jam.

Instead of trying to kick her out (which is exhausting and nearly impossible), I’ve decided to get more curious about her…even love her up a bit. Yes, she’s manipulative AND she also has pushed me.  We’re really quite competitive.  When she has my ear, she’s granted me the opportunity to self-correct behavior that doesn’t line up with my values, seek forgiveness from those I’ve wronged or offer myself a little grace.

But now, it’s time to change the rules of engagement using one short sentence. 

true

The more I say it, the more power it has for all sorts of situations in my life.

When I question her language, my shitty roommate just puts her headphones on and leaves me alone until the next time…and there will always be a next time.  She hates those three words, however, we do seem to be getting along a little better lately.

new handbag in my VIDA collection

https://shopvida.com/collections/voices/lisa-lillibridge

VIDA handbag Lisa Lillibridge

“Enjoy the journey of life and not just the endgame.”

—Benedict Cumberbatch (my hero/Sherlock Holmes on BBC series)

perfect is the enemy of good (or done)…

With the help of Voltaire, I’ve created a quick reference to help with my ever present procrastination.  I refer to things I’ve left undone as an “open loop”.  I can put a quick circle to illustrate whether I’ve just started, I’m in the middle or only have just a little bit left to “close the loop”.

“Perfect is the enemy of good is an aphorism, an English variant of the older better is the enemy of good, which was popularized by Voltaire in French form.” (Wikipedia)

It’s worked pretty well for me so far, except when I get struck by the beauty and simplicity of the shape and start researching circular song lyrics, photographs or poetry…baby steps, Lisa, baby steps.

walking on eggshells

walking on eggshells/URBAN DICTIONARY:  To watch what you say or do around a certain person because anything might set him or her off.

I’m trying to notice when I’m walking on eggshells.  When I do, it seems like an invitation for some growth.  I’ve personally mastered some pretty sophisticated avoidance techniques…I’m working on it.  I will work on it for a lifetime.  I’m choosing to celebrate when I have a little bit of awareness that I’m walking on eggshells and at least thinking about what’s required of me next.  Sometimes just one boot in front of the other, no matter how small the steps are is the best we can do.

Lisa Lillibridge walking on eggshells dakota

VIDA added a photograph…

to my collection.  I haven’t seen this scarf printed yet.  I’ve placed an order though.  It’s one of my favorite photographs that I’ve ever taken.  I shot this one week after my 50th birthday.  I didn’t intend for the title—fading beauty to sound like a lament of any kind.  I truly find beauty when things are “fading” and changing.  Although I miss a few things about being younger, I was fine saying goodbye to my forties.  I like my fifties…so far anyway.

I wanted to share the image.  Here’s the link to my site.

https://shopvida.com/collections/lisa-lillibridge

my gentle giant

I discovered this image of my husband Jeff’s legs this morning.  The photo had cool shadows and movement to work with.  After a bit of goofing off and layering—this series is what emerged.

Jeff is off exploring his world right now in a very BIG way.  The first image on the road reminds me of the South Dakota Monster stories my Dad told all seven of his grandchildren.  I don’t see my husband as a monster though—much more like a gentle giant.

We’ve always told our children that they are part prairie & part sea.  When I started choosing photos to layer with Jeff’s legs I was naturally drawn to images of the prairie and the sea.

Here’s to your big adventures this weekend, wherever your feet take you.

Jeff walking on the prairie Lisa Lillibridgeexploring the prairie lisa lillibridgeJeff Govoni on beach approach bigger than lifeFacing our Fears Lisa LillibridgeJP heading to sea

Taking on the World

  1. South Dakota two-lane road near Burke
  2. Abandoned farmhouse south of Burke, South Dakota
  3. Town Neck Beach approach,—Sandwich, Massachusetts
  4. Everglade National Park in Florida
  5. Town Neck Beach, Sandwich, Massachusetts
  6. Florence, Italy

the gentle power of “mend”

This morning I woke up with the word “mend” on my mind.  What a simply beautiful word.  I kept thinking about it while I actually mended a few things.

  1. A suede jacket I inherited from my paternal grandmother.
  2. My daughter’s blue jeans…not a rip in a fashionable spot.

I realized that mend somehow uniquely seems more feminine to me than its masculine cousin, repair.

Mending and sewing connects me to the ancient wisdom of mothers, daughters, sisters, grandmothers, aunts and friends.  Women have been sitting together stitching, solving problems, laughing and crying in gardens, front porches, church basements, adobes, tents and huts throughout the history of the world. This is a part of all of us, even if it hasn’t necessarily been our personal experience.  We mend in the way I did today, but we also mend broken hearts, bones & skin, relationships, nervous systems, false narratives and so much more.

Here’s to mending whatever is in your literal or emotional stack of damaged goods. 

Go ahead, tap into that ancient wisdom. 

The ladies are waiting to help you.