It’s the last day of school…

here in Burlington, Vermont.  My twin girls will be seniors next year so I’m heading into my last year of parenting kids in high school.  I’m finding myself feeling uniquely nostalgic.  I’m not sad about the inevitable transition, but I am mindful.

Last Day of School Lucy and Willa

I have friends whose oldest or only children are graduating on Friday.  It’s big.  When my son graduated from high school in 2014, I was sort of a mess.  I believe there’s just something about transitions that requires us to take stock of our emotions.

The summer between my junior year and senior year of high school was rough for me.  I had a lot of friends in the class above me and they were all leaving for college and other adventures.  Every time during their senior year when we played a ball game, sang in a concert or went to the drive-in movie theater it felt like we were saying goodbye to our childhoods.

Last weekend in South Dakota I got to spend time with some of those friends who graduated a year ahead of me.  It was great!  I simply cannot believe how much time has passed…1983 and 1984 just don’t seem all that long ago in some ways.  I’m very aware of how my daughters are feeling this last summer before they graduate from high school…perhaps even a little too aware.

I guess to honor life’s transitions, we need to slow down a little and try to understand what it is we’re feeling…the good, the bad and the slightly confusing.

Happy Graduation Class of 2017!

 

these images just keep coming…

I love it when an idea won’t let me go…it seems that it’s demanding more of me.  I have some travel time to sketch and write today on my way to my niece’s wedding in South Dakota and maybe some thoughts will take root.  I’m pretty sure these images are in reaction to my “shitty roommate” post from last week.  Perhaps these images represent the flip side of our lousy inner voice?  I thought of this quote as I worked on these photographs.

“Courage is like—it’s a habitus, a habit, a virtue: You get it by courageous acts. It’s like you learn to swim by swimming. You learn courage by couraging.”

—Brené Brown

Below is the link to the post I”m referencing.

https://lisalillibridge.com/2017/05/12/three-life-changing-words/

is complex thinking “always” smarter?

complex thinking lisa lillibridge

“Complexity is your enemy.  Anybody can make things complicated.  It’s hard to keep things simple”.

                                                                 —Richard Branson

From a LIFEHACK.org article:  “The understanding that complex thinking is not required at all times can significantly help conserve valuable energy. Though major projects and problems may require abstract thinking, day to day life approached in a simple way can help ease stress levels and potentiate energy for the things that matter to you most. Practicing discernment in this area therefore, may prove very beneficial in your progress through burnout.”

lifehack.org LINK

Fee-fi-fo-fum

Close your eyes.

Think of yourself as a GIANT looking down on your life.

What do you see?

Do things you stress over seem smaller from this vantage point?

We can all access our giant anytime…Fee-fi-fo-fum.

I haven’t named my giant yet…but I have a few ideas.

 

three life changing words

Lately I’ve been thinking about my “shitty roommate”.  This is my personal inner voice—she makes me doubt myself all the time.  She puts those snarky thoughts in my head that I’m “not good enough”, “not reaching my potential” or “if only you were more like…”.

Shame is the inner language of self-attack and self-blame AND shame is my shitty roommate’s jam.

Instead of trying to kick her out (which is exhausting and nearly impossible), I’ve decided to get more curious about her…even love her up a bit. Yes, she’s manipulative AND she also has pushed me.  We’re really quite competitive.  When she has my ear, she’s granted me the opportunity to self-correct behavior that doesn’t line up with my values, seek forgiveness from those I’ve wronged or offer myself a little grace.

But now, it’s time to change the rules of engagement using one short sentence. 

true

The more I say it, the more power it has for all sorts of situations in my life.

When I question her language, my shitty roommate just puts her headphones on and leaves me alone until the next time…and there will always be a next time.  She hates those three words, however, we do seem to be getting along a little better lately.

perfect is the enemy of good (or done)…

With the help of Voltaire, I’ve created a quick reference to help with my ever present procrastination.  I refer to things I’ve left undone as an “open loop”.  I can put a quick circle to illustrate whether I’ve just started, I’m in the middle or only have just a little bit left to “close the loop”.

“Perfect is the enemy of good is an aphorism, an English variant of the older better is the enemy of good, which was popularized by Voltaire in French form.” (Wikipedia)

It’s worked pretty well for me so far, except when I get struck by the beauty and simplicity of the shape and start researching circular song lyrics, photographs or poetry…baby steps, Lisa, baby steps.

walking on eggshells

walking on eggshells/URBAN DICTIONARY:  To watch what you say or do around a certain person because anything might set him or her off.

I’m trying to notice when I’m walking on eggshells.  When I do, it seems like an invitation for some growth.  I’ve personally mastered some pretty sophisticated avoidance techniques…I’m working on it.  I will work on it for a lifetime.  I’m choosing to celebrate when I have a little bit of awareness that I’m walking on eggshells and at least thinking about what’s required of me next.  Sometimes just one boot in front of the other, no matter how small the steps are is the best we can do.

Lisa Lillibridge walking on eggshells dakota