where is my heart today?

We all are a bunch of contradictions.  It’s hard for me to admit that this is true—every part of me wants to deny this about myself.  I would rather have elective dental surgery than investigate this further.  Actually I need some dental surgery, I’ve been putting it off…another contradiction.

I did this quick check today to notice my noticing

Good grief!

where is my heart today

DAMN.

I stared at the words I wrote that are entirely at odds with each other. 

bitter—grateful

loving—rage filled

curious—certain

open—closed

Can I actually hold all of these contractions at the same time? 

YES.  I can easily throw all of these messy, contradictory emotions into my bag, grab my keys, walk out the door and go on with my day.  We all do it all the time.

NOTICING is helping me understand myself a little better. 

I have a lot of emotional work to do
AND I don’t really want to do it.

LIFE IS AN ABSURD AMOUNT OF GREY AREA.

BLACK & WHITE thinking can make us rigid, limiting available options.

Just ask my kids, well, no actually please don’t.

Head or Heart.  Winner or Losers.  Right or Wrong. 

This just isn’t the way the world works.  When it does, things can fall apart.

 

I came across this website today…interesting: DIFFERENCE BETWEEN.

“‘Believing’ means that you have chosen a truth, but ‘knowing’ means that you are certain about that truth.”   

I had to read that line about ten times.

link: difference between knowing and believing

link: difference between religion and faith

AND JUST FOR FUN…

link: difference between casserole and hot dish

Good luck with your noticing.

in the ruins…my love story

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